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|Close Encounters of the
Preciousssss AS Longboard
Bay Area Longboarded
San Francisco Bay Area, California
The alt.surfing chronicles of the "A.S. Clusterfuk Redemption Tour"
"Which posters to alt.surfing have you met, surfed, or tripped
with, where and when?"
My first Close
Encounter with an AS'er was... when I belonged to Paul Richardson.
Name The Board Contest:
Name it "Terry", after Terry Anderson, the American journalist
who was held *hostage* for seven years.
The Board Moves East.
Todd... Paul offers... Rod collects... Paul sends... Todd... alt.surfing ASplodes... Todd... jw offers...
Passing of the board - Name The Event.
|Dennis: Thu, May 11 2006
mentioned it in a post below, but I think it's worth it's own topic.
I think the board should have a name of it's own, and the event should
have it's own name as well. Special thanks should go out to Paul for
donating the board to Todd. And Todd, for his part in the birth of this
event, also deserves special mention. This is the biggest thing since
Thermie! Any suggestions?
|Surfer Bob: Thu, May 11 2006
Did Todd actually write on it the words "the paul richardson traveling alt.surfing board"? If so, I'd say it's already been named. And a simple, straightforward, surferly name it is.
(Click for larger image)
|Tom Tweed: Fri, May 12 2006
I think Awe is onto something here. What started out as a
somewhat misguided and idiotic attempt at some kind of social
service gesture turned into a divisive, mean-spirited phenomena
that caused much unnecessary hate and discontent on AS. It truly became
a Clusterfuk, but it is finding a way to right itself, so I recommend
that it become the "A.S. Clusterfuk Redemption Tour."
The board has already been named "Preciousssss" in prior posts (and on
the AS Encounters page), but "Gollum" or "Smeagol," after the Tolkien
hobbit who descended into selfish obsession over the Ring, but finally
played a key role in its destruction and the salvation of Middle Earth
might be more appropriate.
I think the traveling AS board is a stellar idea and the birth of a
unique Internet legend. I hope that it makes it way around the US and
then to Hawaii, New Zealand, Australia, Asia and Europe,
and is signed and ridden by as many AS contributors as possible. If it
comes to So. Cal., I will definitely make an effort to ride it, sign
it, and pass it on.
>SteveM should organize a vote :)
Oh God, NO!
|Todd - We Did It!!!!!!!! - May 11, 2006 - Bye Bye Board
with johnw this morning! Some basic pics to follow. He paddled out and
rode it in knee/thighish waves at a semi-secret ri spot:-) I suited up
but it was dead low tide and being a cobblestone reef, I was unable to
tolerate the pain in my feet on the rocks [neuropathy]. Oh well, I tried.
It was good seeing you johnw, as always. Naysayers, I want an apology.
I told you it would get done and I happily sent it on its way today!
Looking forward to many pics and stories in the future. Once again and
always, thanks to Paul Richardson for the original donation of the
board. I signed it off as..... "The Paul Richardson Traveling alt.surfing
Board" :-) .............. todd.
John Webster - I Have The Board - May 11, 2006
Date: May 11, 2006
Place: RI, US
Air: 52F (18C?)
Water: 49F (17C?)
Wind: up to 15 kts. from the ENE
Precip: slight drizzle at times
Waves: occasional barely waist high drop, tapering to thigh-high lines
Rating: Waves had some decent shape to them, but
overall, poor conditions, with quite a bit of surface chop, but
rideable on a longboard... wouldn't have normally paddled out, but did
so for a good cause.
Nota bene: We didn't get pix of me surfing the board. Todd had my
camera and he was on the shore while I surfed, but... no pix. I may
take it out once more just to get pix of me surfing it, before handing
it off to Mike G... I have plenty of boards of my own, but it's an
important part of the process.
Todd and I got out on the board today in little barely waist-high chop.
Waves certainly could have been a lot better, but it was rideable on a
I got a few waves on it, it's a very easy wave-catcher (and rider).
Cheated up to the nose on a couple bumpy thigh-high "walls." Nice,
board, Paul, and fin. I have a shorter Becker longboard, the Fugitive.
Yours is back in the bag, Todd stored it carefully and safely. I got a
couple waves on my 9'6" Hansen today, as well. We were only out for
about a half hour.
Anyway, we got some pix, signed the board and it's sitting here in Rhode Island. Mike G. you might be next.
Thanks Todd (and all the donors)! You got it done, as I always knew you
would in the end. Good to see you again, young man! :)
Now, it's godspeed to the board and global AS'ers who ride it. Look forward to tracking it and reading about it here.
John Webster and The Board
(Click for larger image)
|The AS Troops Are Now Concerned That jw Is Catching Gollumitis
|From: Awe F'shore
Date: Sun, Jun 25 2006
Allright jw - gigs up. Beware - you've been gollumizing the stick long
enough. I bet Todd's LH@O now that he's free of the curse of the
It seems to have you fully within it's grasp. You need to get it down
the road, no more excuses, no more bullshit threads about transfer
dates looooooooooooooong into the future.
Go ahead. Get hammered and give us a good drunk post and let us know
how you REALLY FEEL about passing it on. Do it! Naowwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww! Sometime before summer's over already!
Meanwhile, out here in the land of continuous south swells, one right after another, I have the
It's bringing us waves! The curse is over - Foon cured it. It should stay put here now. Really!
For awhile at least.
Now back to you're regularly scheduled demise of AS.....
Date: Tues, Jun 27 2006
lol!!! Is there such a thing as a one-post meltdown?
Send me some o' that...whatever it is your drinking and/or smoking and
I'll be sure to consume large quanities and see what comes out on the
(Side-note -- I'm in touch w/Mike G. The responsibility of the next
hand-off is foremost on my mind, despite a really hellish schedule.
Anyone closer than 250 miles away is welcome to meet me in RI, or come
pick it up. But fret not - it will move on! In fact, I can't wait to
get the behemoth out of my storage room...it's taking up more space
than my 10-piece living room sectional! ;))
Date: Thurs, Jun 29 2006
jw had procrastinated for several months in the summer of 2006. He had
promised to send off the board, but his promises had become totally
hollow. The good people of alt.s began to think some sort of disease
had gripped Todd and jw. Then one fine morning in August as summer
began to fade away, jw awoke to the sound of a chain saw starting up.
It was AWE!! He had gone totally psycho. There he was, the surfboard
laid across two sawhorses, wood laying around where he had practised
and Awe standing there with the chainsaw raised high above his head.
jw rushed out to scream NOOOOOOOOOO! at Awe, but he stumbled across the
legs of someone tied up sitting in the grass outside the door. My God!
it was Him, the cursed one. It was
To be continued? Does Todd find the three cans of Colt 45 in jw's fridge?
From: Awe F'shore
Date: Thurs, Jun 29 2006
Hell no, Awe had already drank them! And this was after he had already
drank two cases of Red Stripe, so Awe had a good buzz going!
Looking down at the tumbled mass of bodies strewn about , and the
glazed look upon the faces of those who had been under the longboard
curse for so long, Awe laid down the chainsaw and grabbed his camera
gear. After all, it was a photo op not to be missed!
That's when the Starbuck's-mobile pulled up, blaring it's horn loudly,
and Shaft stumbled out with coffee bong in hand. He had a small
statured dude with him, a video camera, a fistfull of bottle rockets
and a sector 9 skate. WTF? Awe thought he was having flashbacks of
something that he couldn't quite place hid finger on.
Just then, Rico galloped up on a fine black steed, flashing lot's, I
mean, we're talking LOT'S of sharp steel! He was looking somewhat
(to be continued)
Other Digretions and Historical Notes
From: Captain Fantastic
Date: Tues, Jun 27 2006
so, I had been away from this group for a whole long time. the crew has
changed for the most part... fang isn't around any more, airey, and
some of the others.
also, the traditions have changed. some. the as-wsd is still around (i
hope to make it next year and report out). but now we have the Thermi
award, which, best i can tell is for the best wsd detailed run through.
please clarify if there is a better description for this.
what really has my interest is the AS longboard. i have been reading
some of the convo, the deal with todd etc. i see the board has changed
hands and may be on it's way to the west coast.
however, what i'm missing with the aslb is, how did thiscome about? how
had a 'spare' longboard that they donated to the ether? what does one
need to do to pay homage to and perhaps even ride the now as famous
stick? any chance it'll make it's way to the bay area? i'd certainly go
to some trouble to ride it if possible. my daughter is learning to surf
and that would be a better board for her, for at least a littel bit,
than the one i bought her.
anyway, just looking for insight, history and clues. i don't mean to
dredge up unsavory feelings and old arguments. i really am just trying
to catch up on what i've missed, besides the spammers and all of the
missed surf reports.
and, btw, since i left (circa 1995), with the advent of the web, it
sure is nice to see the pics in more real time. the stuff OBSurfr and
Awe put up usually kill. it has added a much appreciated dimension to
Daniel Hinojosa - http://www.RNDH.Org/surf/
From: Tony Malasadas
Date: Tues, Jun 27 2006
Start here: http://tinyurl.com/syzek
The Precious Longboard Moves From Rhode Island to New Jersey - August 16, 2006
(Click on pics for larger image)
John Webster Hands Off The Precious Longboard to MikeG
|MikeG on the Rocks
|MikeG Riding Ruggles, RI
||John Webster and MikeG
Pardon the small weak waves, but it was a nice day to get in the water!
Trunking it, no crowd, just two AS'ers dominating the peak...;)
Surfer is Mike G., none of me surfing the board (again), but I got
three very memorable decent length rides. We traded boards in the water
for a few waves. The board is smooth. It would be a good summertime
board for around here. It was surfed leashless, but neither lost the board, nor
dinged on way in or out - although there was the fear that it would get
its first ding. Mike got far more rides than I did, on the AS board and
my 9'6" Hansen, after getting a few on the fish before I arrived.
Words of Wisdom for MikeG: Mike is a good spirit, but even the Precious longboard might hold sway
over him, despite his best intentions. He doesn't realize the power it
contains. You think you're cruising right along, doing the right thing,
and then, bam! you realize you've had the board for three months,
you're staring at it for hours on end, neglecting family and friends,
you're work suffers, and the waves stop coming. OH The Humanity! Think
of the children!! :)
P.S. Yes...the board seems to accompany at least small waves upon hand
off. I'm hoping now we will begin to get bigger waves, since I have
removed the onus from my neck. The albatross, etc. A pox on New England
has been vanquished. Let there be waves. Todd you out there? The board
has left RI!
Surf Report: Rhode Island - "The Precious Moves" - MikeG
trip up from NJ was a breeze, I left my house at 0500 and was in
the water in front of the lighthouse by 0800. I had spoken with JW the
night before and said I would arrive by 0900 so after leaving him a
message I decided to paddle out on my fish in the marginal conditions.
The best part of the paddle out was the cool water on my slightly
There was a lone longboarder on the
peak who I though might be JW, but after seeing him up close the kid
seemd to be in his mid to late teens. The waves were weak, and when I
saw a Saab with 2 LBs strapped to the roof pull up, I knew it must be
JW. I scrambled up the rocks to meet him and we exchanged pleasantries.
I had mentioned the possibility of spearfishing instead of surfing, so
I think JW was surprised to see mewith my board under my arm.
JW presented me with the board. The
fact that the waves were so small made me thankful to see the
gargantuan size of the precious. It's inquite good shape, Paul you are truly a charitable bloke.
As JW got ready to jump in I
immediatley grabbed the prize and unlike Smeagol, I let Deagol live,
and escaped into the ocean. The board felt like it was meant for me,
fitting like a well tailored suit and I was up and riding it in a
moments time. In less than 10 minutes I must have ridden the board 5
times, catching wave after wave, walking the board, even going switch
stance, while the other surfers windmilled for scraps. "I love this
board, I love this board, I love this board, Itwas meant for me and no one else!!!!!!!"
Sorry, something came over me for a second...
JW made his way out, and we caught a
few more rides, switching back and forth between riding the two LBs. I
told JW, "Whenever I come to RI something good happens" and this was no
exception. The ocean provided something to ride, the weather was
perfect and I met a geniunely good guy in JW.
Thanks for the board, the pics and the quick tour of some breaks I've missed in the past.
JW had to go, but I decided to linger
and soak in the perfect New England summer day. I stopped for a lobster
roll near town and watched some fisherman near a boat launch as I
noshed on the sandwich. I couldn't help but notice the plethora of
baitfish in the water, breaking the surface every now and again as
predators chased from below. After eating, my curiosity got the better
of me and I jumped into the fray with my spear. Yahoo! Striped bass
were everywhere, I chose an appropriate sized morsel,poked it and plopped it in my cooler for dinner that evening.
All in all a great day to be near the sea.
MikeG - August 30, 2006 am - "My Time with the ASLB"
& Foon are heading North to fetch the AS Longboard. In the past two
weeks I've spent some time with the Longboard...
August 30, 2006 - ASLB Continues South
|First off the board looked a little dingy, so I cleaned it up
|(Don't worry, I put 2 brand new bars of wax in the bag)
Then, I had some material laying around,
so I made a sock for it.
After that it was time to sign it...
But then I started to worry about the next
the Govment boys of AS. I was a bit worried that trace
chemicals of illicit material might be found in the
board, so I ran
results were interesting, but they will be sealed as evidence to
protect me against subsequent investigations. I'm off to meet Rod &
Foon now with a clean board, and a clean conscience.
I only had the board for 14 days, and the only time I was able to surf
it was the day I got it from jw. That's what an Eact Coast summer
is all about, no waves. Anyway the handoff was made and a photo op was
had. We also got some food, and then I surfed, but on my 5'8"
I was able to meet Rod & Foon in Bradley Beach, NJ
today to pass off the precious. The Guidopalooza is sure to be a
success now. We took some pics in M@rks old haunt and then retreated to
Kelly's Irish Tavern in Neptune for some spirits and good fare. Of
course we talked about
all of you, but what happens in real life, STAYS in real life!
Thanks for making the trip guys, sorry you had to leave. I ended up
surfing punchy waist high surf for a couple of hours in nice warm water.
Good Luck at GP 06.
**** Insert Many Missing Posts Here ****
October 19, 2007 - The AS CF Longboard -- Get It Moving!
OK, this is important.
What is the problem with the AS Clusterfuck Longboard? Why has it been
sitting in Florida for six months? The idea, if you'll remember, is to
pass it along as quickly as possible (i.e., in a month or way less, if
feasible), so that other AS'ers can enjoy it. That's the reason you
have it in the first place, so hop to it! None of this, it's too far to
drive. Sail it to Andy fer crissakes! Mike G. drove three hours to get
it from me (and we had a grand old time riding it in tiny waves).
For those who don't know the what I'm talking about (which I doubt,
because it's the same six people posting that were posting last year,
hence my conversations with myself):
You get the idea?
I am going to reply to this post every day, until the longboard moves.
Awe, feel free to chime in, my friend. And anyone else who is sick of
this thing gathering dust. It was meant to be ridden, and passed along,
around the world. I'll be retired before it ever makes it to Calif.,
where it found its first home, compliments of PR. So, stop stroking its
beautiful lines. Stop hugging it, or whatever is being done to it. Stop
using it as a coffee table. Get the frikken board moving!!!
Don't make me send my assistant down there to find out what the problem
is. She doesn't like to clean up problems...that's why she's my
assistant: she has her shit together.
Now, it's happy hour here in jolly ol' New England, I've started in on
my first Narragansett pounder (I tip it in your general direction,
Carson), and I want some real info when I get back from hittin the town.
(And, since there is so much ascii misinterpretation going around... I'm saying all this with a smile.)
AS CF Longboard pioneer
New England pilgrim
I hear it will be arriving in Socal for the "Swell of 2012" according to Hopi legend.
Awe, you were
the ringleader in torturing me about that damn cursed log! Pick up the
slack, and start haranguing Ferg, will ya? Otherwise I won't buy you a
beer when I finally visit SD (or move there for short term). Oh yeah,
Ferg never posts here anymore, so he can't get harangued. OK, I'll do
it "in absentia," or whatever.
I want to see pix of the AS CF LB being ridden, signed, and moved the
hell out of FLA, pronto! The AS CF LB page must be updated! The board
must be moved -- it's got a lot of traveling to do before it gets to OZ.
I'll have my assistant draft an inter-office memo on the topic, and
after I've signed off on it, she'll distribute it to all parties
involved. If this is not attended to ASAP -- heads are going to roll!
AS needs pics of the assistant. Tell us more about her. ;)
I'll let you run the haranguing show. You've earned it - although I may toss a lure or two on occasion.
October 21, 2007 - The Current Keeper of the Longboard Replies
I drove 4 hours round trip to pick it up, and got skunked on surf in
the process. I almost flew it with me to Salt Lake City to pass it on,
but it was too big for my flight.
I've also wrote to a couple of old ASers' e-mails that I haven't talked
to in a long time, to see if they were interested in it.
Don't blame me, just come and get it.
October 27, 2007 - Re: The AS CF Longboard -- Get It Moving!
Our friend in Alabama was less than an hour away from me at one point.
We were in contact, but he turned his back on Preciousss. Now, he's the
most vocal critic....
My beach had its first seasonal cold front this week. I rode Preciousss
in waist-high mush wednesday. I'll have waves every week now, so She's
finally off my carport rafters and getting put to use.
So now I'm supposed to go to a greyhound station and ship this big log away?
NO! NO! she's MINE MINE MINE!!!
Come and take her from me if you dare...
July 12, 2008 - Got rid of the traveling lingboard
first wave I caught Saturday morning was the best wave I had in a few
years. It was just before 7am into dawn patrol. It was typically
a 3-5' day, dropping to 2-4' after by noon, but that first wave was a
Big outside freak I could only have chased down on the 10' log that
Precious is. I didn't do much on the wave, except barely outrun the
fast folding lip all the way to shore, pumping down the line more than
I would expect to be able to do on a board like that. I caught a few
more big outsiders after my
blood was pumping. It brought back some old memories...
The three longboards I still have are 9' to 9-2" slim-profile boards
with various rocker (all three are getting kinda worn out). Yet when I
learned to surf in the mid-80's, much of my basic skills and style were
developed on a 60's era 10' log a friend of mine had. This board was at
least 50lbs, and I weighed maybe 120lbs at the time. I'm 190 now, and
Precious isn't that heavy. Anyhow, I learned how to swing a big board
around down the line during a phase in history when longboards weren't
that popular. I didn't care as a teenager at the time because I was
more into the skater clique than the surfers. They were separate back
Excuse me for rambling at 5am, it's been a long day. My point is I
hadn't caught an awesome overhead wave on a big 10' tanker since I was
a teenager, and it felt good. I was glad my wife and some of the fellas
at the hotel saw the ride. I think my next new board will be freakishly
The tide went out and the ridable waves got smaller, but I managed
about 3 hours of water time this morning. I had some poorly organized
communications about picking the board up with the Dukester at the
South Beach Inn (a 20 room motel next to the 16th street park in south
Cocoa Beach). We tried to talk in the previous afternoon but couldn't
hear each other over noisy backgrounds. Then he texted me back after I
was asleep. The next morning I couldn't reach him. I was hoping he'd
show up following my messages, but he had been chasing bigger waves 4
hours away, north of the Cape. I had heard
some spots up there were about 8' from various sources.
I worried a bit as check-out time lingered. I tried a couple back-up
plans, as I didn't want to haul Precious back to Tampa again. The
number I had for Jane Moody was disconnected. I called Andy in Bama
too, because he had suggested prior that I could leave it with someone
he knew in Melbourne.
Andy tried but wasn't able to reach his friend though.
I told the owners at the Inn the story of the longboard and showed them
the signatures on her belly. They were interested in the saga and
agreed to watch over her, and Duke finally got in touch with me and
said he'd pick her up there. They are good people at the Inn, and I
trusted her with them. One of the guys wanted to ride her in the
afternoon, I should have told him to add his signature if he did. If
Duke reads this in time, please pass the word since they are part of
the chain now.
The swell was dropping before lunch, during which I met my wife's
cousin who was transferred to Patrick's Air Force Base 6 weeks ago (A
free place for me to crash now!) Before I left town it looked like it
might be picking up, but the wind was onshore and a thunderstorm was
looming. I'm glad I caught what I did, it was a good day. I had to work
in Ybor City tonight. Bedtime now.
I snapped a few photos here at around 11:30:am from the Inn: http://tinyurl.com/5kjdk5
(Click on pic for larger image.)
|At the Dune
||At the Surf
||At the Inn
July 15, 2008 - The Supreme Court: "I Have the Traveling Longboard"
Hit 95 S this AM, surfed, and drove to the place Ferg dropped it off.
This is Round Two for me and it means that I will ride it again and
sign it again.
In striking distance for moving this board: Andy? Blakestah? Anyone else? Ideas, ideas, ideas....
I'll be in Jax this weekend if any takers...
The Supreme Court
|July 31, 2008 - The Supreme Court
"The Tarveling Lingboard"
Since the "tarveling lingboard" came back into my possession it has been ridden by no less than 6 people (5 plus me).
Dec 27, 2008: "The Lingboard Moveth"
The "tarveling lingboard" has changed hands. I dropped it off this AM
in Sat Beach. It should show up in Andy's area in the next two weeks or
so. She was a nice ride, good trim, and drew a nice line.
So long lingboard (for the second time).......
|Jan 6, 2009: "Lingboard Down South"
had some small swell Saturday, the Barrister had brought the Traveling
Longboard to its rightful owner and all was well in the world.
Waves were thigh to knee with a couple dozen waist-high sets coming
through. The water was warm, the sun was shining and sandbar 23X was
working marginally well.
I pulled the board out of the bag for a first look-see. Not a bad
shape, the nose seemed a tad narrow for that sized board. The cutaway
fin was loose in the box like crack-ho's teeth, and there was a big
ding on rail near the nose. I borrowed some electrician's tape from
Adam and sealed it up as well as possible. Looks as if someone came
down on the right-hand deck with their knee as there is a huge pressure
dent near the rail... Todd? One of the GP goons? Other than that it is
in good shape (click on above pic).
First impression was that it paddles like a canoe, jeeze I can haul in
that thing. Completely fun board to surf, with the fin all the way up
in the box it is actually sort of loose (could be my size), moreso than
I expected. It also had... uhhh projection? Going right I floated a
section and thought I was going to become bogged down in the soup, but
the board had enough inertia to make it around the mush and hook up
with the continuing right. Fun. It is not a nose-rider for my weight,
possibly a smaller guy could pull it off.
Stayed in the water for about three hours, had a good time hanging with
some friends and sliding some nice little waves. Post session shrimp
po-boy at Bauxdeans washed down with a couple cold ones.
Freaky the thing will not fit in the Jeep, stinking big board (click on above pic).
ca. 2011 - The Preciouuuuuuus Moves on to La Jolla, San Diego, CA
many years in Purgatory (south Alabama) the very Preciouuuuuuuuuus Long
Board escaped to the land of many surfing deities. More of that story
is buried somewhere on alt.surfing.
been lagging on getting ya'll the physical evidence, but here are the
pics you have been waiting for of the ASLB on the left coast again.
Some of the signatures are getting a little faded, but are mostly
legible still. Andy's new Tiki sig is the freshest (and probably the
I still haven't signed it, but I did ride it. I will have to say it wouldn't ever be the first choice out of my quiver. ;-)
I need to get on with organizing the other SD ASer's to ride it, sign it, and pass it on.
October 4, 2011
Next Round of the Preciouuuuus Saga Coming Soon...
AS Points Log: I have...
|... met the following ASers
||...surfed with these ASers
||...traveled with these ASers
John Webster (jw)
|01 x 1 point =
||07 x 2 points =
||00 x 3 points =